I Choose You…No, You

ceramic cake topperWhen my husband and I stood at the altar those many years ago, he was surprised that I married him first. I don’t know whether  the minister conducting the service just wanted to change it up that day, but I actually gave him his ring first and declared that I “wed” him “in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Ghost”.

That recollection came to mind when I heard about the Indian bride who decided to marry one of her wedding guests when her husband-to-be fell ill and seemed unable – at least when it mattered the most – to hold up his end of the bargain.

I don’t pretend to know how weddings are conducted in other cultures so I’m hoping that she wasn’t so desperate that she couldn’t wait for him to recover – but rather was  just a little pissed that her special day wasn’t going exactly as she’d planned it.

The bride – who asked a member of her brother-in-law’s family to step up to the plate – decided to move on because the epileptic condition that her first husband-to-be suffered from (and which had taken him to the hospital before he could say his vows), had not been disclosed to her.

I have watched a number of those road-to-the-altar shows and I’m thinking that this bridezilla was a little late in coming out. A lot of counselors will tell you that prior to marriage it’s usually a good idea to discuss matters relating to money (who’s got the most of it), sex (how often – if at all),  children (if any) and religion (where the kids will go to Sunday school).

Apparently they forgot to add pre-existing medical conditions to the mix, but it does make sense because they can certainly have a bearing on your finances.

I quite agree that when two people are getting together there should be as few secrets as possible, but maybe the medical condition over which he had no control made him feel a little less-than and his disclosing it would have made him an unsuitable candidate in her eyes.

Seems like he guessed right….

The woman, like most of us, was probably looking at all the money that had so far been spent – and seeing that she had made up her mind that she wasn’t marrying anyone who could be walking next to her one minute and succumbing to a fit in the next – decided that it shouldn’t go to waste.

And since everybody was already there….

For quite a while now, a lot of us have been guilty of putting more effort into the weddings than into the marriages themselves. So if there’s a hitch in the ceremony a whole lot of money could go down the drain, not to mention the fact that nobody would ever forget it. A failed marriage on the other hand, doesn’t quite make the ripples it used to.

The formerly incapacitated groom returned from the hospital to find that his bride had moved on, but was still trying to salvage his pride (by asking her to reconsider) even though it was clear that her priority had been to salvage her wedding.

One commenter on the story wondered whether the new groom had undergone a physical before saying “I do”. I think that’s more than likely, because there’s nothing like having insurance when you make that vow to stay with someone “in sickness and in health”.



7 thoughts on “I Choose You…No, You

  1. Wow, that is unbelievable (unless there was some previous connection between them). Why would the man do that? How couls she do that? Boggles my brain.

    PS, When we got married (My Mum was a marriage celebrant) we said the “I do” part together.

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